Prime and Prejudice
by Vellaa
Summary: AU. A modern day New York love story based around the famous story of 'Pride and Prejudice'. Can Mondler eventually find their love in each other, all the while evading the obstacles thrown at them?
1. Chapter 1

**TOW The Prime and Prejudice**

**By Vellaa**

_based on Jane Austen's 'Pride and Prejudice'. I do not own the novel or the characters of Friends. (Obviously ;p)  
_

…

**Chapter 1**

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. (Pride and Prejudice, first line)

"Morning everyone!" Phoebe sang as she waltzed into the well known apartment under the ownership of her two dearly close girlfriends.

"Hey Phoebe," Monica greeted from the kitchen table, joined by her fellow roommate, Rachel, and brother, Ross.

"So…do I have great news or what?!" Phoebe announced as she helped herself with some of Monica's pancakes. The wide grin on her face clearly showed her news to be good, so Monica smiled along, intrigued by her friend's enthusiasm.

"What is it Pheebs?" Rachel asked.

"Okay! Guess who's moving into the building?" She posed eagerly, waiting for any response to come from the table.

"Ryan Seacrest!" Rachel shouted hopefully. Monica gave her a scowl, wondering how on earth she had come up with such a random answer. "What, he's cute," she defended.

"Anyway!" Phoebe interrupted. "I don't their names, but they are the two cutest guys I've ever seen. And I think their famous cause there's a whole bunch of paparazzi outside…"

"Oh my God!" Rachel cheered, rushing towards the large bay window.

"Yeah, I just passed them down at the lobby. Oh, and one of them was totally checking me out but I totally blew him off. But you know, I think this could be really good for you, Mon," Phoebe said with bated breath.

"And why is that?" Monica responded, though knowing what Phoebe meant by her statement.

"Because...you need to go out there and become a woman again. You're always stuck in here, cleaning and cooking, and plus, you don't even have a job," Phoebe griped.

"Oh, c'mon Pheebs. You know I'm not looking for any relationships. I told you I'm happy with my life," Monica stated casually, hiding her face to not show her blushing cheeks. She began to clear up the table but Phoebe was not going to put it at rest.

"That's a whole lot 'a crap Mon. C'mon! You need this more than anyone," said Phoebe, but Monica's embarrassment only rose. Sure she had been single and desperate for almost a whole year, but she's passed on the need to have a boyfriend. Hasn't she?

"Hey, what about me? I'm not in a relationship," Rachel disrupted, as she returned from gawking through their window. Her comment however brought slight pain into the heart of the man sitting at the table.

"Rach! Monica's the one who needs help, not you!" Phoebe scolded.

"Thanks," Monica remarked unenthused.

Rachel had no idea, but Monica and Phoebe had known about Ross' feelings for Rachel ever since she had recently moved in. They had always pursued the idea of Ross and Rachel together as they were considerably the perfect match, but Ross, being the coward he was, did not want to risk losing Rachel as a friend. God only knew that Rachel held the same feelings towards him.

"Phoebe, I told you. I'm happy with my life," said Monica, though not at all convincingly.

"Okay fine. But don't come crying to me when you're all alone and fed-up about your lonely life cause I won't be there handing you Kleenex's," she rebuked, pointing her finger at Monica.

"A little harsh Pheebs," said Ross.

"I'm just saying, don't blow off another opportunity," said Phoebe. "Remember Richard? How you broke up with him because he wasn't 'up for children'. And then when he got married you started to have feelings for him again. That was hard on you. I don't want you going through that again," Phoebe consoled. Monica had finished with the dishes before turning around to face her friend.

"Aw, that's okay, Pheebs," she said as she wrapped her arms around the blonde. "But it won't be like that again, I promise, but…" she sighed exasperatingly, "Just to make you happy, I'll think about it, okay?"

"Okay, thanks," Phoebe smiled.

"Alright, so while you girls sulk over your love lives, I'm just gonna head off to work," Ross stood up from the kitchen table after having finished reading his morning newspaper. "Thanks for breakfast Mon."

"No problem. Oh don't forget about tonight. Mom and Dad are coming for dinner, remember?" said Monica.

"Oh shoot! Forgot about that. I'll be there," he said, taking one quick glance at Rachel, before rushing out the door.

"Bye," Phoebe and Rachel announced simultaneously.

As the door shut firmly, Monica sighed and sat herself down at the couch. Rachel, who had been sitting at the table, announced her departure shortly after.

"Okay, I'm off. I got another job interview at Fortunata Fashions," she called out, and began to fix her hair, which did not go unnoticed by Phoebe and Monica.

"Well, you better hurry up – those guys downstairs won't be there for long," Phoebe teased.

"C'mon Pheebs, I gotta look perfect for this interview. This could be my only chance to get a real job," she swayed, before moving swiftly out the door.

"I guess you have to leave too?" Monica griped a while later.

"Well, soon. I can keep you company till nine," Phoebe replied, and took a seat beside Monica.

Monica sighed again as she watched the blank screen of her TV. Phoebe looked at her friend, wondering what was on her mind that seemed to be bothering her.

"What's the matter?" Phoebe asked, concerned.

Monica simply shook her head, not wanting to talk at the moment.

"You want a boyfriend now, don't you," Phoebe quipped, though she meant it seriously.

"No," Monica idly laughed. "Can we please drop that?"

"Okay, alright," Phoebe smiled.

"I'm just so bummed now that I don't have a job," Monica brought up, after a long silence, afraid that Phoebe might somehow force the truth out of her.

"Oh. I can't really help you there, but I can tell you… that no matter how hard your life has become, always remember that it's easier with a man by your side," Phoebe proclaimed, as though she were imparting sage advice.

"Phoebe!" Monica rolled her eyes, knowing that from this day forward, she was not going to hear the end of Phoebe's proposal. She knew very well that her friend was only joking with her, but in all seriousness, Phoebe really did care for Monica's well-being. Monica did not want to admit it, but in reality, she truly did wish for her 'Prince Charming' to come knocking on her door, someday soon.

"Anyway I better go, before I unleash the beast," Phoebe said, referring to Monica's anger as it rises at its peek.

Monica rolled her eyes and scoffed, before following Phoebe out the door.

"See you soon," said Phoebe.

"Take care," Monica waved into the hall before closing the door.

It was going to result into yet another day filled with solitude and despair. There was always a cure for Monica during a time like this - Cleaning. It usually resulted when put under stress, but Monica really needed to feel comforted and in control, therefore cleaning the apartment until spotless was the solution.

It was not long after she had mopped her kitchen floor when a knock on the door startled her. Monica looked attentively at the door, wondering who on earth it could be before noon. Sliding out of her apron and taking off her rubber gloves, she gussied herself up before opening the door, just slightly.

"Yes?"

"Hi, I'm Joey Tribbiani. I'm gonna be living across the hall with my friend. This woman named Phoebe told me to come here…?" he smiled awkwardly at the situation, knowing that from the look on Monica's face, he had been set up by the kind blonde stranger.

"Uh," Monica stood dumbfounded, not knowing what to say in explanation of Phoebe's emblematic behaviour. She could not help but stare at this man before her: His charming looks and smile were enough to dazzle her. Realising that her silence was freaking him out, she shook out of her reverie and smiled politely.

"Hi. Sorry if my friend made you uncomfortable in any way. I'm Monica," she opened the door wider and offered for a handshake.

"That's okay. She was friendly. It's nice to me you Monica," said Joey, who returned her handshake.

The two stood gaping at one another, before Monica abruptly pulled her hand away. She cleared her throat and looked down at her feet to hide away her blushing cheeks. Was it always going to be ill at ease for her when in the presence of handsome men?

"So, uh, I'm just gonna head back to unpacking," he said in reference to the boxes sprawled out in the hall. I'll hope to see you soon?" he hoped.

"Y-yeah. Sure," she replied. "Uh, do you need some help unpacking?" She asked politely, knowing very well how much she loved to unpack and organise.

"Oh no, that's alright. I've got my good friend Chandler to help me. Chandler!" he called out towards the staircase. Joey grinned sheepishly at Monica before heading back to finish his job.

"You take care of yourself, Monica," he smiled, before turning back into his own newly bought apartment across the hall.

"Okay. Bye," she smiled in return, before closing her door.

Monica leaned against her door, smiling at the sudden turn of events. Perhaps Phoebe was right: she really did need a boyfriend, and who knows, Joey could maybe turn out to be her 'Prince Charming'.

…

That night, Monica had busily prepared a very prestigious dinner for her parents' upcoming arrival. As she was just about done with the lasagne, Ross strolled into the apartment, looking well done up and smart in his shirt and tie.

"Hey," she greeted, before setting the large tray onto the bench.

"Hey, something smells good," Ross commented, sniffing the air filled smell of Monica's professional cooking.

"Yeah, I just took out the lasagne to cool it off. Have you heard from Mom and Dad yet?" she asked.

"Yeah, I was just on the phone with them. They said they're on their way now," he replied.

…

"…oh, and my new apartment is really amazing. It's just a few blocks from here. You guys should come around and check it out," Ross finished in self-appreciation.

The night had been filled with nothing but Ross' daily achievements and his endless accomplishments at work and life. Poor Monica could not have any say in their conversations, nor had she even been complemented once on her food, or the cleanliness of her home.

"Sure son. Just tell us when you're free from all your work and we'll come any day," their father stated, helping himself with the salad that was situated in the middle of the table.

Sure, and when I ask for them to come over they're always inconveniently 'busy', Monica thought before preparing to clear up the table.

"So, Monica," her mother began as Monica stood from the table, "anything new with you? Work, life, relationships…?"

"No! Mother," Monica snipped, before laughing off to hide her sudden outburst, "Nothing's new with me, at the moment."

Her mother smiled, knowing well of the expected answer that was received from her daughter. Monica was currently not in the disposition to handle her mother's scrutiny. She began with the dishes, hoping that she would be forgotten and that they would go straight back to praising their son. She was wrong.

"I just assumed that at your age you would have at least met the man, or **a** man, in any case. Cause you know, a man should be the prime deal in your life as a woman," her mother rambled on. Monica had to bite her tongue to avert the improper words, directed at her mother, from escaping. "It's just that, your bother has married and divorced and you still have yet to become engaged. I mean, you don't even have a job -" she rambled on.

"That's enough Mom!" Monica slammed down the dish that she had held and turned around from the sink. "I'm a grown woman. I think I can be capable of what goes on in my own life. Now, could you please just let it go?" Monica did not want to say anything, but the look of disbelief on her mother's face made her just want to point and laugh. All her life, she had been put under the pressure of her mother's expectancies that she, in her mother's eyes, could not seem to obtain. It had come to the point where she almost felt despised by her own mother.

After a long uncomfortable silence, Ross, who had been looking back and forth between Monica and his mother, broke the silence.

"So, Dad – anything new with your life?"

…

"Argh, I can't believe her. She thinks she can just come up here and do whatever she thinks. I mean, I invite her to my home, I cook them dinner, and all I get is an enquiry of the status of my life. I think I would know by now that I do need a job and a husband…," Monica yelled in her shrill tone, whilst putting away all the left over food into the fridge. After the awkwardness between mother and daughter finally cleared off, their parents thanked them for dinner and left the apartment. Monica, on the other hand, had been dying to let out the frustration that she had held in her system all throughout the night.

"Mon, you need to calm down," said Ross from the couch. "Mom was just…"

"Mom was just what? Tired? Stressed? Annoyed by the growing knowledge that I would soon be incapable of marriage? Or even kids?" she interrupted. "I was all those things!"

Ross was taken aback by his sister's stressful state, and wondered if it may have been caused by the absence of alcohol tonight. Usually, when she was under her mother's strain, Monica would normally be in a corner sipping her scotch, just the way she liked it - on the rocks with a twist.

"Monica, come here," Ross approached his sister and wrapped his arm around her. "You need to sit. Let's just relax a little on the couch, and maybe watch a bit of TV, huh?" he moved her away from all the commotion in the kitchen and guided her towards the couch. "It'll get your mind off of jobs, and your love life, and anything else that has to do with mom, okay?" he said, in a soothing tone that he hoped would ease her off her anxiety. To his advantage, she obliged and slumped down onto the couch, before watching whatever was being played on the television. "See, isn't that much better?"

"You can shut up now Ross. I'm fine," she declared in annoyance.

"Okay, then. I'm just gonna head off now. I'll leave you alone for a while," he whispered and slowly backed away towards the door.

As Monica heard the door shut firmly, she sighed in relief for finally being left alone. Sometimes being alone wasn't all that bad. Sometimes she liked having her time to herself, to think things over, or maybe even re-organise some of her belongings. How would she be able to achieve those things with a man constantly in her face? See, it wasn't always happily-ever-after with a boyfriend. Wasn't it?

…

_Hey, so I've had this on my mind for quite some time but the site's been unable to work for some reason...wierd. Anyway, now that it's working i've had the opportunity to publish this. I hope it's good, so enjoy! Next chapter's up soon. _

_Oh, and please review. _

_Thanks!!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Prime and Prejudice**

**By Vella  
**

**Chapter 2**

**...  
**

"Mon? Monica?"

"In here Rach," Monica's disembodied voice called out from inside her bedroom.

Rachel stood by the bedroom doorway, and spotted Monica lying on her bed, still wearing the clothes she had on that night. Noticing her gloomy expression, Rachel stepped in and sat beside her roommate.

"What took you so long?" Monica asked resentfully, her voice muffled by her pillow.

"I'm sorry sweetie – I was at Phoebe's," said Rachel sympathetically. "Why did you call me so early? I thought your parents wouldn't leave till late."

"They left early," she stated bluntly.

"Is everything okay?" asked Rachel, looking down in concern at her best friend, rubbing her back soothingly.

Monica simply shrugged. "I don't know," she said. "I've been thinking…" she then pulled herself upright on the bed; "I'm 27 years old."

"And it took you that long to finally figure it out," Rachel quipped.

"No. I'm just saying… I'm not young anymore," Monica turned to her friend, eyes wide in horror. "Rach, I'm gonna shrivel up and die if I just don't get out there and start doing things!" (That line was from Cougar Town ;D)

"Mon, you're not gonna shrivel up and die, okay? You're young, you're smart, you're hot. Babe, your life is complete. You just need a job, is all," Rachel reassured.

"Yeah well according to my mom, I was meant to be at least engaged during the time of Ross' marriage with Carol. Has she just chosen to ignore the reason of his divorce, just so she can continue to make me feel more miserable about myself?" she complained, But Rachel shook her head in disagreement.

"Don't listen to what your mom says. You don't need a man to feel complete. You still have a whole lifetime ahead of you. I mean, look at me," Rachel pointed to herself as a demonstration, "I'm not in a relationship, and I'm definitely not close to having a job, and I'm as happy as I have ever been," she said.

Just then, the knock on the door startled them both and Rachel looked at Monica questioningly.

"Who could that be?" asked Rachel.

"A guy must've heard you and came to ask for your hand in marriage," Monica remarked sarcastically, before slumping back down onto her bed. Rachel walked out of the room to answer the door.

"Hey Joey!" she announced happily, as she swung open the door.

"Hey Rachel. How are you?"

Adrenalin rushing through her, Monica shot up at the familiar voice and quickly fixed herself up. She checked the mirror once before stepping out into the living room, her heart pounding in a fit of excitement.

"I'm good. What's up?" Rachel asked, smiling broadly as she stood leaning against the doorframe in the presence of not only a young handsome man, but a celebrity. Monica walked up behind Rachel, but not so much so as to show her presence to their new neighbour outside.

"Oh, I just came by to ask if you were free tonight. Me and Chandler are going to a nightclub and I was wondering if you and Monica wanted to come?" he asked. Monica's eyes widened in shock, knowing her roommate well that she'll be sucked into going out tonight.

"Uh, yeah, sure. Just hold on a second," Rachel closed the door just slightly and turned from her spot to be confronted by a questioning Monica. After going through her diminutive depressing period, Monica wasn't really up for colourful drinks and loud music.

"I'm not going," Monica responded to Rachel's pleading look. "No."

"Please," Rachel begged.

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"C'mon Mon. You said so yourself that if you don't go out and start doing things, you're gonna shrivel up and die, or whatever," Rachel said, but before Monica could say anything, Rachel turned around and opened the door again, this time being met with Joey and another man.

"So? You coming," Joey asked.

"Yeah. Just give us five minutes and we'll be ready," Rachel smiled, causing Joey to charmingly smile back at her.

Monica felt a slight pang of jealousy at the fact that her roommate had now stolen the man that could possibly have been the 'one' for Monica. But then again, who was that much cuter man standing beside Joey?

"Okay. Chandler and I will be downstairs waiting."

Chandler didn't say anything, but instead, stared at Monica until she flushed and looked away. The effect that Joey gave on Monica this morning was much stronger now that she was in the presence of this 'Chandler' man.

Rachel closed the door and literally pushed Monica into her room to get her dressed and ready for a night out – A night that could change her life into something she had always dreamt of. But would it go exactly as planned?

…

The two girls walked down to the lobby, where they were to meet with their dates for the night. The sounds of stilettos hitting hard wood floor was enough to make their presence, as Joey and Chandler turned around and gaped in awe.

"Wow, that dress on you looks amazing," Joey complemented, looking Rachel up and down.

"Oh, this old thing?" she giggled, flirtatiously.

Monica looked up at Chandler, hoping he could perhaps complement her, but to her disappointment, he was more transfixed on the street outside.

"So, we all ready?" Joey announced, and the four made their way out of the building.

Chandler walked ahead, his hands not once leaving his pockets. Monica wondered if he was going to be like that for the entire night – ignorant and rude. Maybe he was just shy, or had a rough day. She hoped that they could at least get to know one another.

"Oh my God!" Rachel bellowed, as her hand flew to her mouth.

Monica, seeing what had amazed Rachel, gasped in excitement at the sight in front of them. "Wow, are you serious? I've never ridden in a limo when no one died!" Monica yelped.

The chauffer stood by the open door, as the four stepped into the black stretch limo parked just outside the apartment.

"Oh wow! Leather seats! Drinks!" Rachel yelled excitedly, as she was the first to enter and take notice of its luxury.

The two men sat at either end, with Monica and Rachel comfortably in between.

"Here, you want some champagne?" Joey grabbed the ice cold bottle from the mini fridge beside him, before pouring each of them a glass.

"This is so cool. How did you afford all this?" Rachel asked, before taking a sip.

"Oh, didn't I mention? I'm an actor," Joey proudly stated.

"Oh, I know!" Rachel gloated. "What would I have seen you in?"

"Well, I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives," he boasted, but was cut off when Rachel seductively placed her free hand upon his thigh. Monica, seeing this, rolled her eyes and turned away to face Chandler, who hadn't spoken a word since their meeting.

"So, um Chandler is it?" she asked nervously, wondering if he would even reply. To her amazement he turned away from the window and looked at her.

"Yeah, that's my name," he stated monotonously. Monica was lost for words as she wondered why she hadn't noticed how blue his eyes were. Chandler stared at her for a while before she finally shook out of her trance.

"I'm-I'm Monica," she stated with a friendly smile, before taking a sip of her champagne.

"That's pretty," he stated simply, thought with no such compassion.

The remaining of the ride had been filled with awkward one-word conversations between Monica and Chandler; whereas, the duo beside them could not stop their flirtatious contact-making and constant fits of giggles. Was it something about Monica that was not desirable enough for Chandler? Then again, she had only just met him a few minutes prior.

The limo pulled to a halt in front of a large colourful building with a line of waiting people, and Chandler was the first to step out, followed by Monica. She was slightly taken aback when Chandler offered his hand as she stepped out. Before she could even thank him, he had already let go and walked off towards the main door of Avalon Nightclub. Joey and Rachel, hand in hand, walked up with Monica, before coming across a tall, lean security guard. Seeing Joey approaching, he stepped aside, and the four casually made their way in.

Monica and Chandler followed Joey and Rachel upstairs and into the V.I.P section, where Joey had been expected, as it was evident by the number of people greeting him as they strolled passed. The four sat themselves down onto the colourful couches, where they were joined by other actors and celebrities. Monica adjusted her skirt further down, so as to not look to inappropriate, though it was not as easy considering how short Rachel's skirts were.

"Wow, I feel so special. Do you do this often?" Rachel asked Joey as he placed his arm around her shoulder.

"On occasion, yes, but it's no big deal," he replied nonchalantly.

Monica watched Chandler out of her peripheral vision. The fact that they sat so closely, and the scent of his cologne, brought a thrill of stimulation to Monica. Although he may not have seemed very warm and friendly earlier, she still could not help but think how cute he was. She really wanted to get to know him more, but could not think of a way to begin a conversation. She turned to Rachel and Joey, who both seemed too busy in their own little discussion. She looked back at Chandler, but when he caught her glance, she quickly turned away. Luckily, the room was dark enough to hide her red cheeks.

"So," she began in the fullness of time, "are you an actor too?" Monica had to slightly raise her voice through the loud music playing.

Chandler looked down at her, and Monica could have sworn that she saw him smile just barely.

"No," he yelled back against the music.

"Okay then," she shouted. "So, what do you do for a living?" she asked, trying to maintain his attention on her, before the air would be filled with awkwardness.

"I'm an IT Procurement Manager with a specialisation of Statistical analysis and data reconfiguration," he replied off by heart. Monica scowled questioningly before nodding her head, pretending to know what he had said.

"Would you excuse me for a moment," she said, before turning behind her to tap on her friend's shoulder. "Rach! Rachel! Can you come with me to the bathroom?" she asked eagerly, after gaining her attention.

"Yeah sure," Rachel stood in front of Joey and straightened her short tight black dress. "I'll be back sweetie, just gotta go to the bathroom," she said.

"Sure babe. I'll be waiting," he raised his eyebrows seductively, causing Rachel to giggle. Monica rolled her eyes, knowing fully well how drunk her friend had become, before pulling her out of the V.I.P area and down the hall where the bathrooms were to be found.

"Oh my God," Monica said exasperatingly as they entered the ladies' room, but Rachel had misinterpreted it as her being amazed.

"I know, isn't it great!" she nearly shouted, while looking at herself in the mirror above the sinks.

"No Rach. I mean, 'oh my God' as in 'get me out of here'," Monica almost begged.

"What? Why?" Rachel turned away from the mirror, looking at her friend inquisitively.

"Rachel, I'm bored. So far I think I've only gotten like five words out of the guy…"

"Who, Chandler?" Rachel interrupted. "He's so cute. I think you two would get along great."

"Please, there's nothing to get along with. I mean, I don't think he's even interested," she said, moving to fix her hair in the mirror.

"C'mon, don't be silly. Maybe he's just the type that doesn't come on too strongly," she suggested, also fixing her hair again in the mirror.

"I don't know," Monica replied miserably.

"You know what," Rachel began suddenly, "You need to act more engaging. **You **havegotta show **him** that you're up for a relationship. Or even just sex."

"What?" Monica asked, stunned by her friend's openness.

"I'm serious, Mon. You haven't been out with a guy in such a long time. Besides, when was the last time you had sex?" asked Rachel.

Monica thought for a moment before she was interrupted.

"See! A long time ago," said Rachel. "You need to get out there, and go flirt with the man. You gotta get intimate; be sexy. Act more like a slut if you can." She smiled suggestively.

"You know what? I think someone's had a lot to drink," Monica accused, as an excuse to get herself out of the situation that Rachel was putting her in.

"I think so too," she laughed. "But I'm having the time of my life! But promise me you'll do it. I bet ya that Chandelier guy is waiting out there for you, just like you've been waiting your whole life for him," said Rachel, pointing directly at the bathroom door for emphasis.

Although her words were slightly slurred, Rachel was surprisingly right. Maybe Monica was being too prejudice over Chandler. After all, it had been a while, and all this felt almost new to her.

"Okay! I'm gonna go have sex!" Monica announced confidently, before turning towards the bathroom exit.

"No. Don't have sex now!" Rachel laughed. "Just act like you **want** to have sex."

"Okay," Monica nodded before making her way out, followed by a tipsy Rachel.

The two girls marched back towards the V.I.P couches. Monica ran her hand through her hair before slowly, taking a seat, closely, beside Chandler. Joey had been chatting with several other girls that were surrounding him, until Rachel showed up. Monica looked at Rachel, who had sat on his lap. She gave a wink to Monica, before nuzzling up against Joey's ear, knowing very well that Monica was watching. Monica turned away and looked at Chandler, who also had been watching his roommate. She knew that it would be too inappropriate for her to do the same to Chandler, so instead, she thought of another way to come onto him.

After several long minutes, she broke the silence, though it wasn't really silent with all the background music and commotion.

"You know, the name Chandler is really unique," she stated, swivelling her finger around a strand of her hair.

"I had really unique parents," he replied.

"Oh cool! What's that like?" she asked, but received an awkward glance from Chandler. She berated herself for coming up with such a stupid question.

"I'm gonna get a drink. You want anything?" he asked, smirking just slightly.

"Yeah, I'll have a RED string bikini!" she replied. Chandler nodded, before making his way to the bar. As soon as he was out of sight, Monica sighed in frustration. If she was going to try and seduce him, then she would be looking at a long, hectic night.

Monica looked around, tapping her knees impatiently, until Chandler finally came with her drink.

"Thanks," she said, and in just a moment, slurped the entire glass until there was nothing left but the fruit it sat in. Chandler watched in shock as she placed the glass onto the table in front.

A few beverages later, Monica was clearly drunk and out of her mind. Her words were garbled, and most of the time, anything that came out of her mouth was seemingly inappropriate, especially for unfortunate Chandler who had spent most of the night acting as Monica's bartender.

"Wooh!" she yelled without restraint after placing her unknown number ok drink onto the table. "That was fun," Monica uttered, as she sluggishly placed her head onto Chandler's shoulder, her words coming out in a gush of breath into his face.

"You're so adorable. I could just cut you up and eat you!" she said into his face. Her comment made him all the more uncomfortable. "You know I'm a chef. Well, I used to be," she scoffed, and then began to laugh uncontrollably. "But then…then I got fired!"

"That's really, um…," Chandler squirmed uncomfortably in his position. "Could you perhaps lift your elbow off my crotch? It's kinda digging in."

"Oh! Sorry!" she laughed and moved off of him. "So…" She held his cheek and moved his face closer to hers. "You wanna play a lil hard to get, hmm?"

It wasn't long before Rachel's high pitched squeal broke their little uncanny progression.

"Joey! I wanna dance! Let's dance, babe," she tugged at his arm, and he stood up, before the duo made their way downstairs. They both began moving their bodies in rhythm to the loud music played by the DJ, until they were lost in sight beneath the crowd of dancers.

Monica watched below until an idea popped into her head. She looked to her right, and very uncharacteristically of her, though she could not control in her drunken state, ran her fingers through Chandler's hair.

"Chandler? You wanna dance too?" she pleaded, though it was only an act to seduce him. Whatever was going through her mind, she could not control, though it only caused a further excitement to arouse through her body.

Chandler watched her curiously - Beginning to get a little jumpy by her touches, he moved away, aside from the fact that her mini skirt had raised up unknowingly brought to him a slight arousal.

"No thanks, I'm right," he replied solemnly.

"Please?" She near-begged, "I wanna see you move," she smiled seductively. His face held a look that told her that he clearly did not want to get up, but she ignored it and stood up in front of him.

"C'mon, Mr!" and she pulled at his arm until he tentatively lifted himself from the couch. Monica grinned from ear to ear as she excitedly lead him downstairs and to the dance floor. No way in her sober life would she have ever pursued a man to dance, especially after she acting so pathetically, though she didn't seem to comprehend much after those last beverages.

Pushing passed the crowd of strangers, Monica finally found a spot in the middle of the dance floor, before letting go of his hand, and began moving her body to the song. She checked to see if he were staring, before beginning to change her moves into a slightly much sexier sway of her hips, though a little unstable in her drunken state. Chandler, on the other hand, scowled as he stood watching her dance as though no one were around.

"Uh, Monica I really don't think…" he began but was cut off when she, without warning, grabbed his hip and began to grind up against his crotch. Monica smiled when his eyes widened with astonishment. She then moved her free hand behind his neck and, and with the sudden urge coursing through her sweaty body, she threw herself at him, kissing him passionately on the lips. In an instant, Chandler placed his hands on either side of her hips. Thinking that he was accepting the kiss, Monica went to the next level and stuck her tongue into his mouth, but was overwhelmed when he pushed her away. Her breathing ragged and her mind spinning from the alcohol, it took her a while to bring herself to consciousness before realising that Chandler had walked off.

…

_I hope ya'll enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a review on your way out….! Thankyou!_


	3. Chapter 3

**Prime and Prejudice**

**By Vellaa**

**Chapter 3**

**...  
**

"Monica, how much did you drink tonight, hon?" Rachel asked, as she held her friend's hair back while she repulsively spewed into the girls' bathroom toilet bowl.

"Shh! No talking –"Monica was cut off by the sudden rise of nausea and undeniably released the essence that arose from her stomach.

"It's okay. Let it all out," Rachel soothed, while brushing Monica's long hair back.

"I just don't understand why he doesn't want me," cried Monica. "Am I not sexy enough? Is that why I don't have a boyfriend?"

"No, sweetie. That's not why you don't have a boyfriend," Rachel explained, not knowing what to say to comfort a crying intoxicated 27 year old woman.

"Then why?" Monica cried.

"C'mon, Mon, up we get. Let's get you cleaned up," Rachel pulled her friend up from her kneeling position and walked her towards the sinks. Ignoring the attention from other bathroom users, Monica washed out her mouth, while Rachel handed over several hand towels.

"You know what? I think he's married," Monica stated out of the blue, after having cleaned her mouth and washed her face.

"No. Chandler's not married. Joey even said he's single and that he had just come out of this really serious relationship…" Rachel rambled, but stopped short when Monica gasped.

"What? He just came out of a serious relationship?" Monica's eyes widened in disbelief and pure mortification. "Oh my God. I can't believe I just acted like that. No wonder why he wasn't so needy and desperate! Oh my God, Oh my God," she began to pace back and forth, repeatedly uttering words to herself that Rachel could not understand. Watching her friend beat herself up like this was not making her comfortable, and what's more, Monica's movements made Rachel feel a little woozy.

"Monica! You have got to relax, okay," Rachel held Monica's arms in place and looked her deep in the eyes. "Just forget about everything, and go back and act like nothing's wrong. Can you do that?" Monica slowly nodded her head, and Rachel let go of her arms. "Good. Now let's go home. There waiting for us at the limo."

The two girls made their way out of the bathroom, through the noise filled smoky crowd, until reaching the exit. Upon seeing their limousine parked outside, Rachel and Monica headed towards Joey and Chandler standing by its side, who hadn't noticed them approaching, as they were so caught up in their own conversation.

As they made their way closer, Monica overheard the two speaking to each other. Monica smiled when she saw Chandler talking to Joey, though it soon vanished when she heard the comment that shot out of his mouth.

"C'mon dude. It couldn't have been that bad," Joey articulated.

"Not that bad? Joey, the woman literally stuck her tongue down my throat! I mean, I would have rather spent the night at my mom's than being stuck with someone so immature and humiliating," Chandler snapped.

Monica stopped in her tracks, and her heart shuttered to pieces. He really did hate her.

"Mon, are you coming?" Rachel looked back at Monica, who had obviously not heard Chandler's remark about Monica.

"Y-yeah," she stuttered, and caught up beside Rachel.

"Hey, what took you so long?" Joey asked them both, as their presence was acknowledged. Chandler looked down at Monica, but she purposely ignored him and stepped into the limo.

"Sorry, we got caught up in the ladies' room," Rachel replied and followed Monica in.

As they were all seated in their seats, the limo headed off into the busy streets of New York City. While their night had been filled with festivity, their ride home was a time to relax and ease their throbbing heads. Rachel and Joey sat in each other's arms, exchanging smiles and kisses, while Monica sat the furthest away from Chandler, not wanting to see or even be near him. Never in her life had she felt more humiliated and jabbed in the heart than ever before. Chandler, on the other hand, sat perfectly quiet, minding his own business and space, not knowing why Monica was suddenly acting so distant after she had been nearly groping him back in the club.

"So, did you girls have fun tonight?" Joey asked. "I know Chandler and I had a great time."

"Really?" Monica retorted. "Cause I think some of us looked as though they didn't wanna be here tonight," Monica looked at Chandler forebodingly, and he tensed up, knowing for certain that she had overheard him speaking to Joey earlier.

"Well maybe that 'some of us' would've enjoyed their night if it wasn't for the constant bothersome of others," Chandler quietly remarked in return.

"Oh okay," she scoffed loudly enough for everyone to hear. "I'm really sorry for trying to make a conversation. Next time we meet, we could just sit there in our own little world enjoying the silence filled air," Monica quipped.

"Yeah and maybe that way we wouldn't have to worry about anyone's lips being attacked by the other," he spat out.

"Uh, what's going on guys?" Joey interrupted their little third-person quarrel. Both Monica and Chandler sat back with their arms crossed, deliberately facing away from one another.

"It's nothing Joey," Monica replied, and the remaining ride had been filled with nothing but the uncomfortable silence caused by the sudden dispute.

As the limo slowed down, they knew they had arrived home. The chauffer opened their door, and Monica and Rachel both stepped out, followed by Joey and Chandler.

After the several flights of stairs, the four stood silently in the hallway, between each apartment, ready to depart from one another.

"Thanks for a wonderful night Joey. It was really nice meeting **you**," she directed at Joey, and her intent was not unnoticed by Chandler, who rolled his eyes in response.

"It was my pleasure," Joey smiled. Chandler, eager to leave, unlocked their apartment door, and just as he was about to walk in, he was stopped.

"Aren't you gonna say goodbye, Chandler?" Joey asked, concerned of his impoliteness.

Monica smirked, knowing very well that he did not want to say anything nor be in their presence for that matter.

"Goodbye," he said solemnly, and glanced in Monica's direction before closing the door.

"So, uh, I guess this is goodbye for us too," Rachel said to Joey, smiling endearingly. Smiling to herself, Monica saw this as their ideal time to be alone, so she unlocked her door and stepped into her apartment. After closing the door, her smile faltered when the inconsiderate Chandler popped back into her mind. She placed her bag onto the bench and sat indolently on the couch, before letting out a sigh. Why was someone, who was so darn cute and attractive, had to be so arrogant and selfish, she wondered.

Her thoughts were broken when her bright and breezy roommate opened the door. Leaning against the closed door, Rachel sighed in a dream-like manner.

"That was the best night of my life," she sang. Monica rolled her eyes, and stood from the couch, yawning as a sign of weariness.

"It's getting late. I'm going to bed," she said, though she knew Rachel was too high to even be listening.

"He was so sexy, the way he held me, and kissed me. It was just…too much for words," she said to no one in particular.

"That's nice Rachel," Monica replied without much attention. "Goodnight." She closed her bedroom door and changed into something much more comfortable then the mini-skirt and boob tube that her, 'considerate friend' made her wear that night. As she was settled comfortably in her bed, her thoughts kept drifting back to the man across the hall. No not Joey - he was already positioned into Rachel's mind. It was Chandler she kept thinking about. Aside from his haughtiness and self-pride, there seemed to be something else that she was drawn to. Was it his eyes? His stamina? His soapy clean smell? Well whatever it was, it was seemingly strong and extraordinarily unforgettable.

…

"Hey sleepyhead!" Rachel cheered, as Monica shuffled out of her room and into the sunlit living room where she was greeted by her two closest friends. Her hair in a mess, eyes still half closed and puffy - Monica's terrible hangover was not going to run smoothly today.

"Mmm, my head," she grumbled, making her way straight for the aspirins in the top cupboard of her kitchen.

"Wow. Looks like you two had quite some night. And I'm still angry at you for not inviting me!" Phoebe retorted.

"We're sorry Pheebs. I promise the next time we go out, I'll call you," Rachel said. "You can come too Mon," she giggled from the couch, the sight of Monica's situation coming across as comical.

Monica sipped her water before placing her glass back into the sink. "No thanks. One lousy night is enough for me. I'm gonna go take a shower," she called out before disappearing into the bathroom.

"So what happened last night," Phoebe asked pryingly, and received an earful from Rachel on every little detail from their previous night out.

…

As Monica strolled out of the bathroom, wrapped in nothing but a towel, the familiar voice coming from her door rang through her ears. Immediately, Monica hid back inside the bathroom, closing the door just slightly so as to hear the conversation going on.

"Come on in," Rachel advised.

"Thanks," he said. Monica could hear their footsteps make their way to the living room.

"Can I get you anything to drink?" Rachel disembodied voice asked.

"No thanks. I'm right," he replied.

Monica knew it was a man, but could not make out his voice clearly through the slightly closed door. She suddenly realised that she was still wet and wrapped in a towel, and the contact of cold air creeping in through the door was causing goose bumps to arise from her exposed skin.

"So I came by to ask if you were free tonight, again?" he asked.

"Yeah, I think I am. I would just need to check with Monica. Would Chandler be coming too?" she asked.

Oh good it was just Joey, Monica thought.

"No, I won't be unfortunately. I've got a meeting all night," said Chandler.

Monica tensed at the sound of his voice. Joey did not come alone. Chandler, the guy who outwardly did not like her, was sitting right outside, probably messing up her neatly cleaned couches. She grumbled inwardly at the thought.

"Hey, could I just use your bathroom?" Chandler suddenly asked bluntly.

"Yeah sure. Its right over there," Rachel pointed out.

"Thanks," he said.

Shit! What was she going to do? Monica certainly did not want to see him for sure, otherwise they would have to speak, and everything would be awkward... Stupid Rachel for thinking that she was out of the bathroom, she thought. And to make matter worse, she was pretty much naked under her towel.

Monica probed around for a spot to hide, before creeping back into the shower, misfortunately hitting her ankle on her way into the tub. She closed the drapes just in time, when Chandler walked in and closed the door. Great, not only does she hate the man, she was now going to hear him pee! And with a sore ankle too! Though to her surprise, she heard the tap running. Thank God! She thought. He was only washing his hands.

Monica cautiously peeped through the shower curtain, and watched as Chandler now began to wash his face. She saw him look up into the mirror above the sink, but the shower steam had fogged his reflection. He used his hand to swipe a small section of the mirror, and Monica now had a clear view of his face. The water dripping off his wet hair, sliding down his cheeks, made him look…appealing. She tilted her head to the side, lost in the reverie of his outward show. Chandler sighed as he stared at himself, but his face suddenly changed as he caught a glimpse of another set of blue eyes in the mirror. He turned around, but Monica had moved behind the drapes much quicker. She could not see him, and her heart pounded against her chest, praying that he would not look behind the curtain. It took a few long seconds before she heard the bathroom door open and then close.

Monica sighed in relief, relaxing against the shower wall. She imagined what chaos would have risen if he had seen her watching him all along, and the thought caused her to smile in amusement.

…

"Hey, where have you been?" Monica asked her roommate, as she stepped out of her room, all dried up and clothed.

"Oh, I was at Joey and Chandler's with Phoebe," Rachel replied casually, setting her bag and coat onto the hanger. "She had to go home later, for some client or something…"

"What were you girls doing there?" Monica asked, her voice coming out a little edgy. She couldn't help but feel a little envious at the fact that Rachel and Phoebe were hanging out with the guys, and Monica was left resented and lonesome.

"Not much. Just getting to know one another, hanging out, you know…," Rachel replied casually, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

"And you didn't ask me?" Monica half-asked half-stated.

"You were getting changed still, and we were only there for about ten minutes," she replied. "Besides, would you have really wanted to come?"

"I don't know - Maybe. But it would've been nice to have given me the option," Monica defended.

"Right. I'm sorry." Rachel responded indisputably.

"So did you get a chance to speak with Chandler?" Monica asked sombrely, also grabbing a bottle of water from the refrigerator.

"Uh, yeah, I did, actually," Rachel replied, after taking another sip. She noticed Monica turn away, as though uninterested. "He seemed really nice. We talked about a lot of things. He even asked about you." Monica shot her head up, smiling to some extent, and then scoffed.

"Oh, what does he want from some old humiliating pathetic woman?'' Monica quipped.

"Hey, hey. What's all that about?" Rachel asked concerned

"It's nothing," Monica replied quickly.

"By the way, what happened last night in the limo between you and Chandler?" Rachel asked shortly after, watching her inquisitively, remembering their little quarrel that occurred during their drive home.

"What? Nothing happened," Monica replied, picking at invisible lint from her apron.

"Please, you two argued like cats and dogs. C'mon, you can tell me," Rachel pulled out a chair from beside her, and Monica sat down, and sighed.

"Before we got in the limo, I overheard the guys talking, and Chandler told Joey that I was immature and that he would've rather spent the night at his mom's or something," she said, looking down shamefully. "I don't know - it was stupid."

"Really? He said that? What an arrogant little pig!" Rachel snapped. "And I was just in their home, talking and laughing like everything was okay. Monica, I'm so sorry," she apologized as she hugged her best friend. "If I knew, I –"

"That's okay. You didn't know," Monica interrupted solemnly.

"Well, now I do!" Rachel retorted. "You know, I'll go over there **right now** and tell him off for being so foul and despicable!" she shouted, pointing in the door's direction.

"No, Rach. It's okay," said Monica, appreciative of her friend's consideration. "He's not even worth it."

"You sure? You don't seem okay," said Rachel, as she stood from the table, looking down almost maternally at Monica.

"Me? I'm fine, though I still have a headache from last night," Monica stated, though it was only half true, and she pressed her palm against her head for verification.

"Oh yeah," Rachel laughed, then sobered up. "So, uh…You wouldn't mind if I went out with Joey tonight, right?" she asked ingenuously, raising her eyebrows hopefully.

"No, that's fine. You go for it," Monica smiled genuinely. She hadn't seen Rachel this happy in a long time, and for her to be as excited as she was about a guy was rare, and Monica did not want to be the one to prevent her from living her life. Although Monica knew her brother, Ross, was madly in love with Rachel, and had been since the ninth grade, it was his damn fault for not being the first one to take Rachel's heart. If only Monica could have been as happy and fulfilled as Rachel was.

…

"Rachel, you look so beautiful," Monica praised.

"I know. I think someone's gonna get lucky tonight," said Phoebe.

"You really think so? Cause I was hoping that tonight could be, you know, **the** **night**," said Rachel, giving the hint of hope for a successful date.

"Rachel, I don't think Joey's gonna **propose**. Don't you think it's a little too early?" Phoebe asked, clearly misinterpreting Rachel's comment.

"No, Pheebs. She's talking about having **sex**," Monica laughed.

"Oh, well that's never too early," Phoebe discerned, waving her hand dismissively.

Rachel laughed, and then sighed to ease her nervousness, checking herself out in her bedroom mirror. She wanted tonight to go perfectly, and that meant that she had to look perfect, because, let's face it, Joey was a publicised celebrity. If things were to go too well, she could be the next face in the tabloid. That thought caused further excitement to bubble up in her stomach. Suddenly, the knock on her door brought her back to reality. All three girls squealed in exhilaration before Monica skipped out of Rachel's bedroom to open the door.

"Hey Monica, is Rachel ready?" Joey asked, looking striking in his black shirt and dress pants.

"Yeah, she'll be out in a sec," Monica replied smiling, leaning against the door.

"Okay," Joey smiled in response.

"So, uh..." Monica broke the silence. "What are the plans for tonight?"

"Oh it's a surprise. I haven't even told her yet," he said earnestly.

"Oh wow. How romantic," Monica stated wistfully, without the least sentiment of covetousness.

"Hey Joey," Phoebe greeted from behind, and shortly after Rachel appeared from the bedroom. Rachel smiled brightly as she walked out in her black satin dress that reached down to the floor, looking delicately sensational.

"Hey Phoebe," Joey greeted. "Wow, Rachel. You look so beautiful."

"Thanks. And you look dashing tonight too, Mr Tribbiani," she replied, her smile never faltering, and he grabbed her hand, kissing it gently. With a goodbye from all, the two headed off to their date, while Monica and Phoebe were left together for a night of their own.

"So what do you wanna do tonight?" Phoebe asked eagerly. "Oh, we can make margaritas!" She jumped up and down enthusiastically, and Monica beamed, all her emotions and despondency declining.

…

"No way! You had sex with Carl Anderson? My God, Phoebe!" Monica laughed hysterically on the couch, clearly drunk yet again.

"So what? He was nice," Phoebe stated. "In bed," she added quietly, though Monica heard and began to laugh even more.

"You are such a slut!" she laughed.

"Am not!" Phoebe yelled back, though the wide grin told her face showed she was not at all angry.

"Yes you are!" Monica yelled in return, and knowing that she had won their little spat, she laid her head on the pillow, as all the laughing that night had given her a major headache. "God, I really need to stop drinking."

"Speaking of drinking, a little bird told me what you did the night before," Phoebe brought up, smirking from her position on the floor at the foot of the couch. "Guess you don't seem so innocent now, huh!"

"Excuse me?" Monica retorted. "I didn't do anything!"

"Please, apparently you were all over that Chandler guy, who by the way is **frikkin** cute!" Phoebe added.

Monica scoffed, and then remained silent, unable to find words as her mind wondered back to the arrogant self-centred man that even the intoxication of alcohol could not dismiss from her mind.

"You know, I think he's perfect," Phoebe brought up, breaking Monica's thoughts.

"What makes you think that?" she asked, as she sat up on her elbows, interested.

"Well, he's smart, funny, not to mention hot…" Phoebe listed.

"Then why don't** you** date him?" Monica quipped, but the edginess in her tone did not go unnoticed.

"Woah - What's going on there?" Phoebe sat up taller to better face Monica. "Is someone getting a little jealous perhaps?" she chanted.

"No," Monica retaliated.

"Is someone perhaps in love?" Phoebe smirked teasingly.

"Gross! I'm far from in love. I don't even like him!" she spat. "In fact, he's the last man in this world who I would ever even **consider** dating!"

…

_A/N:  
_

_Yay another chapter. Not seeing much reviews, but the ones I got were great, and just like to say thanks for the comments. Anyway, hope you are all enjoying this story as I'm enjoying writing it. As always, I'd like to hear your thoughts, good or bad. _

_Cheers! XD_

_xx  
_


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